You want an update? HUH? Do ya?? HUH???

Fine. You know what...I'm gonna give you an update. So get off my ass. Here's what's new:

• I had the distinct pleasure of peeing into a cup for a drug test yesterday. No worries about the outcome (I haven't smoked trees for a long time, and low body fat=low solubility in terms of thc retention). Awkward moment when the cute technician was chatting me up and flirting (really) as she was labelling the vial of my urine. Yep. I couldn't make this one up if I tried.

• In related news, I had to get fingerprinted for the new job today at the county jail. Yep. I found out that inmates can have two visitors at a time...either two adults or one adult, one child (So can convicted priests have two altar boys visit at once? Or will they make an exception and allow an adult to supervise?). I also had to get a personal going-over when they couldn't determine why the metal detector kept going off when I tried to enter the courthouse. Guess what, kids? Steel toed boots really WILL set off a metal detector. Guess that little nugget o' wisdom will be handy the next time I have to get on a plane.

• I finished my last day of work in the gym on Wednesday. My 82-year old client brought me two packages of quality columbian...coffee, and a nice hallmark moment to boot. Aside from that, a shitload of hugs from sweaty, appreciative clients. I'll take what I can get (hey peanut gallery- shuddup).

• I went to the Illinois Times' shindig last night, and for the most part I stayed close to Sue and her man Aron. Good times- I met the publisher, talked to the editor (and was told I will be getting compensated pretty well for last weekend's endeavors), and even ran into one of the owners of the ad agency here in town that I seem to continually reference on here as a potential full time gig. She was with one of their graphic designers. One of their new graphic designers. That's been there for about 4 months... Which is about two months shorter than I have waited to hear about a full time position opening up for ME. Anyway...I'm settling in to either 1)establish my own design studio locally, or 2) stop having any crazy ass reservations about moving back to a metropolitan area where I can make better bank and get paid accordingly.

• I crashed out early last night, so in case you're reading this and you called me last night looking to see where I was, and why I wasn't coming out...you know why. Nothing personal. I wish I DID make it out last night so that I could have witnessed CS working his game on TTJ's girlfriend. Why do I always miss out on the good shit?

• Three people have told me that I had better not forget about them when I make it big and become famous...in the last three days. I love this sense of optimism...and I think this is one of the best parts about being published again. Yes, I think I have a healthy sense of ego in terms of my illustration. No, I'm not a snob. I'll readily admit to anyone that I used to be a huge comic book geek in grade school. What of it?

•Melissa just got a new VW bug. I need a new car pretty soon...well, probably not-it's a Honda and has about 300K more miles left on it, I'm sure...

I'm thinking about something cool. Something streamlined, sleek, and modern. Whaddaya think?



GO CARDINALS!