Best. Fight Scene. EVER.

100% Unfiltered BADASSSSSSS.

Coke gets you High!

Found this via Gizmodo:

Have you ever wondered why Coke comes with a smile? It’s because it gets you high. They took the cocaine out almost a hundred years ago. You know why? It was redundant.

* In The First 10 minutes: 10 teaspoons of sugar hit your system. (100% of your recommended daily intake.) You don’t immediately vomit from the overwhelming sweetness because phosphoric acid cuts the flavor allowing you to keep it down.
* 20 minutes: Your blood sugar spikes, causing an insulin burst. Your liver responds to this by turning any sugar it can get it’s hands on into fat. (There’s plenty of that at this particular moment)
* 40 minutes: Caffeine absorption is complete. Your pupils dialate, your blood pressure rises, as a response your livers dumps more sugar into your bloodstream. The adenosine receptors in your brain are now blocked preventing drowsiness.
* 45 minutes: Your body ups your dopamine production stimulating the pleasure centers of your brain. This is physically the same way heroin works, by the way.
* >60 minutes: The phosphoric acid binds calcium, magnesium and zinc in your lower intestine, providing a further boost in metabolism. This is compounded by high doses of sugar and artificial sweeteners also increasing the urinary excretion of calcium.
* >60 Minutes: The caffeine’s diuretic properties come into play. (It makes you have to pee.) It is now assured that you’ll evacuate the bonded calcium, magnesium and zinc that was headed to your bones as well as sodium, electrolyte and water.
* >60 minutes: As the rave inside of you dies down you’ll start to have a sugar crash. You may become irritable and/or sluggish. You’ve also now, literally, pissed away all the water that was in the Coke. But not before infusing it with valuable nutrients your body could have used for things like even having the ability to hydrate your system or build strong bones and teeth.



OK, so...wow. I suppose we've all heard the stories about how soaking coke on your car battery connectors will remove the rust buildup, and the one about how acidic coke can be on the body/teeth/stomach lining...

This just kinda sets me over the edge. I mean, you can't watch Supersize Me without wanting to eat healthier for the next..oh, I don't know...millenia... and this has kind of swayed me back to drinking nothing but water, bottled water, gatorade, and more water. Maybe some iced tea too. Who knows. Let's not get too crazy.

Speaking of crazy, I'm going on 22 days without smoking a cigarette. Wild. The cravings have subsided a substantial amount, and I think my body's back to normal levels. Considering I quit cold turkey, and didn't use anything as a crutch to help me out (i.e., no chew, no patch, no hypnosis...), I think I'm doing ok. THere was another interesting webblog about the health benefits received from smoking cessation, and for any of you reading this that DO smoke, I would reccommend giving yourself a few minutes to read this as well:



Ever wonder what happens to your body the moment you stop smoking?

Within 20 minutes of smoking that last cigarette, the body begins a series of changes that continues for years.

20 MINUTES

*
* Blood pressure drops to normal.
* Pulse rate drops to normal.
Body temperature of hands and feet increases to normal.

8 HOURS

* Carbon monoxide level in blood drops to normal.
*
Oxygen level in blood increases to normal.

24 HOURS

* Chance of heart attack decreases.

48 HOURS

* Nerve endings start regrowing.
*
Ability to smell and taste is enhanced.

2 WEEKS TO 3 MONTHS

* Circulation improves.
*
* Walking becomes easier.
Lung function increases up to 30%.

1 TO 9 MONTHS

* Coughing, sinus congestion, fatigue, and shortness of breath decrease.
*
* Cilia regrow in lungs, increasing ability to handle mucus, clean the lungs, and reduce infection.
Body's overall energy increases.

1 YEAR

* Excess risk of coronary heart disease is half that of a smoker.

5 YEARS

* Lung cancer death rate for average smoker (one pack a day) decreases by almost half.
*
* Stroke risk is reduced to that of a nonsmoker 5-15 years after quitting.
Risk of cancer of the mouth, throat and esophagus is half that of a smoker's.

10 YEARS

* Lung cancer death rate similar to that of nonsmokers.
*
* Precancerous cells are replaced.
Risk of cancer of the mouth, throat, esophagus, bladder, kidney and pancreas decreases.

15 YEARS

* Risk of coronary heart disease is that of a nonsmoker.

When you laugh at the funny noises in this video, keep in mind..

...you're SO going to hell.

Let's F with the Telemarketer

Listen to this guy mess with the telemarketer and just TRY not to crack up.

Great stuff. Have a good weekend, knuckleheads!

A little reminder of the genius that was Jim Henson

This STILL cracks me up.

MooOOooo